The 90s Never Happened

Episode 22: Jude and Bree are Horny for Luke Cage

Welcome to The 90s Never Happened, your one-stop podcast for everything you wanted to know about 90s comics but are too afraid to ask! 
Jude and Bree have been absolutely frothing at the bit for an episode about marvel's hardest hero. He's big, he's bald, he's badass. I'm speaking, of course, of Luke Cage. Daniel has his work cut out for him presenting the first two issues of 1992's Cage to the horniest women this side of a comic book store! So join the fun, bark like a dog, and cross the line into the inappropriate.
And Remember, if anyone asks you what comics they should read, be sure to tell them the 90s Never Happened!
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Episode 21: I'm Tellin' Y'all It's a Crossover

Welcome to The 90s Never Happened, your one-stop podcast for everything you wanted to know about 90s comics but are too afraid to ask! 
This week, through no fault of their own, Dan, Jude, and Bree find themselves lost in the Spider-Man/X-Force crossover "Sabotage". Black Tom Cassidy blew up the World Trade Center, brought Juggernaut back from an undisclosed dimension, and all hell has broken loose in New York City. Can the combined efforts of a forced crossover be enough to turn the tide and clean up all these dangling storylines?
Unstoppable force, meet immovable object. Does this two-part Marvel mess stand the test of time, or does it fall flat on its face? We discuss the comics, the inherent racism, discuss if Liefeld was in on the 9/11 conspiracy, and a shitload more! 
Remember, if anyone asks you what comics they should read, tell them Rob Liefeld predicted 9/11 and the nineties never happened!
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Episode 20: X-Force: No Longer Just a Physics Equation

Welcome to The 90s Never Happened, your one-stop podcast for everything you wanted to know about 90s comics but are too afraid to ask! 
"What are we, some kind of X-Force?"
Dan, Jude, and Bree finished New Mutants in lackluster style in our last episode, and we've moved onto Rob Liefeld's X-Force. We read the first three issues and dissect the art, writing, story, and discuss the mania around this new title. Does it hold up? In a word: no.
Grab your best mutant pals and gather 'round your clandestine base. You're not going to miss of this new violent chapter in Marvel history! And don't forget, if someone asks you what comics to read, tell them the 90s never happened!
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Episode 19: Cable Belongs On Some Kind of Registry

Welcome to The 90s Never Happened, your one-stop podcast for everything you wanted to know about 90s comics but are too afraid to ask! 
Last week we discussed the Rob Liefeld and his contributions to the world of sloppy comic book creation. This time around, we're reading some of his work in 1991's New Mutants issues 98-100. How did Robby do when he took over writing and drawing the final three issues of this iconic run? How many first appearances can be shoved into a single issue? Is Cable fit to to run an army of mutants too young to buy beer?
Find out the answers to those questions and a lot more you didn't think to ask as we see the end of an era and lead into the beginning something new. Join Dan, Jude, and Bree as we Willy Wonka your ass into a world of big muscles, elaborate guns, teenage women in skimpy outfits, confusing battles, and f*ckable cats--All from the twisted mind of Rob Liefeld. But remember, if someone asks you what comics they should read, tell them the 90s never happened!
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Episode 18: Tell Me Liefelds, Tell Me Sweet Little Liefelds

Welcome to The 90s Never Happened, your one-stop podcast for everything you wanted to know about 90s comics but are too afraid to ask! 
Amazingly, we've gotten to episode 18 without having to talk about 90s "icon" Rob Liefeld. Before diving into his run on New Mutants and X-Force, we get into the man behind the feet, pockets, and question-mark-shaped women. Who was Rob Liefeld, and can this podcast do his legend justice? 
Take a journey to the 90s and discover how Rob got himself discovered, forced himself down all of our throats, and created Deadpool. The trash-mouthed comic artist everyone loves to hate has made his mark being a dick, infringing on IP, and causing a shitstorm that almost destroyed Marvel itself. Did we mention he created Deadpool? Because if you ask Rob, he'll tell you himself how he created Deadpool. 
So get ready to ride the wave of mediocrity disguised as greatness before Rob Liefeld sends us a cease-and-desist to pull this episode. And remember, if anyone wants to know what comics to read, tell them the 90s never happened and Rob Liefeld created Deadpool.
Like, subscribe, and do all that good stuff to support the show. Follow us on Bluesky: @90sNeverHappened.bsky.social

Episode 17: The Big Bad Blooper Reel

Welcome to The 90s Never Happened, your one-stop podcast for everything you wanted to know about 90s comics but are too afraid to ask! 
Sometimes life gets in the way of reading comics, so instead of a new episode, we have a blooper reel for you. Hear a pile of slop cut from our first sixteen episodes while we plan our next big stretch. Please enjoy this nonsense made from nonsense and please don't tell any of our mothers what we said.
We'll be back with new content in the new future, and it's going to be about Rob Liefled and X-Force, so be prepared. In the meantime, if anyone asks you what comics you should read, go right ahead and tell them the 90s never happened!
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Episode 16: Cap and Spidey Just Say No

Welcome to The 90s Never Happened, your one-stop podcast for everything you wanted to know about 90s comics but are too afraid to ask! 
Since everyone is getting high during podcast recordings (Bree, mostly), Dan decided to teach everyone a lesson about the dangers of drug use--90s style! We start with Captain America Goes To War Against Drugs (no shit, that's the title) and The Amazing Spider-Man: Skating on Thin Ice. What do Cap and Spidey have to teach young people about drug abuse and how to avoid letting your youth sports team down. Find out how evil space aliens want kids on drugs in a bid to take over the planet. Swing into action on the mean streets of Winnipeg and discover how hockey pucks play a role in drug smuggling! 
Put down your bong or crack pipe, flush those quaaludes down the toilet, and stay out of grandma's medicine cabinet! Dan, Jude, and Bree are here to make sure you just say no! And if any strange men who might be drug-peddling aliens tell you the first time is free while asking about what comic books they should read, make sure to let the know the 90s never happened!
Content Warning: This episode contains conversations about children using drugs, child abuse, drug abuse, and other topics that may be too much for sensitive listeners. Kids, don't do drugs.
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Episode 15: Punish Me, Baghdaddy!

Welcome to The 90s Never Happened, your one-stop podcast for everything you wanted to know about 90s comics but are too afraid to ask! 
This week, Dan, Jude, and Bree get geared up for their first firefight with The Punisher. We read and review issues 47-48 from 1991 AKA The Brattle Gun. What was Marvel thinking when they advertised this as a Dessert Storm tie-in? Is Frank Castle's fake mustache a hate crime? Does the giant gun symbolize a penis? We'll get into all that and more!
So get your bullet-proof jackets and your map of fake countries as our trio of faux experts take you on a journey to a part of the world that's seen more turmoil than a Marvel writing room! And if anyone tells you about these skirmishes in the Middle East while asking about what comic books they should read, make sure to let the know the 90s never happened!
Content Warning: This episode contains historical facts and opinions regarding the area of the world commonly called "The Middle East". Though its discussed with a tongue-in-cheek tone, some listeners may be offended by the content since the source material was a tad on the Islamophobic side with a large scoop of Zionism on top. There are also descriptions of violence, sexual assault, and some political commentary based on the comics we reviewed. 
 
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Episode 14: The Reorphaning

Welcome to The 90s Never Happened, your one-stop podcast for everything you wanted to know about 90s comics but are too afraid to ask! Either that or you just don't care.
At long last, we finish the saga of Peter Parkers on-again/off-again parents, and we do it without Jude! We're reading the Lifetheft (one word) storyline from Amazing Spider-Man issues 386-388 from 1994. What's the deal with Richard and Mary Parker. how does it tie into Vulture's plot to become young again, and why is everyone getting sucked dry? Let our trio-minus-one pretend comic book experts tell you!
Remember, kiddos, if you find yourself no long and orphan and then possibly becoming one again in record time and someone asks you what comic books you should read, tell them the 90s never happened!
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Episode 13: If The Web Shooter Don't Fit, You Must Acquit

Welcome to The 90s Never Happened, your one-stop podcast for everything you wanted to know about 90s comics but are too afraid to ask! Either that or you just don't care.
If Johnny Cochran were alive today, he'd have a thing or two to say about this week's episode. Since he's gone, Dan, Jude, and Bree are stuck lamenting over the second nuttiest trial of the nineties. That's right, it's the Trial By Jury three-issue arc from Amazing Spider-Man 383-385. Our trio of pretend comic book experts put on their pretend lawyer hats. Meanwhile, Peter Parker's perplexing parental problems aren't getting any better. Also, Peter does the worst thing to Mary Jane we've seen on this podcast so far! 
So if you find yourself on trial by a bunch of Iron Man wannabes while your aunt doubts your parents' existence, make damn sure to plead The 90s Never Happened! 
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